10 Essential Things For The Ultimate Apocalypse Getaway Vehicle

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November 18, 2014 by joshfarr

So, you have your supplies, weaponry, crew and an edition of “How to Avoid Being Killed In a War Zone” by Rosie Garthwaite (as mentioned in a previous post by Em). All set right? Wrong. If you want any hope of surviving you’ll need a form of transportation sooner or later to ensure the survival of you and your buddies. Here’s a list of things you’ll need to take into account to make sure that your vehicle of choice is up to the task.

1. Guns/Firing Ports

Starting with the obvious here. If you live in a heavily populated area, then you’re going to need a lot of firepower to make sure your former co-workers/neighbors/absolute strangers aren’t going to be able to get close enough to munch on the flesh of you and your surviving friends. This means finding a way to mount remote guns on your car Death Race style, or creating a space you can fire out of from the safety of your mobile fortress. You could even have a mounted gunner on the roof of your car, space permitting.

2. Armour

If your guns don’t live up to the task, then you’ll need a Plan B, plus you’ll wanna protect the badass person that took it upon themselves to man the machine gun on the roof. This includes metal grates over all your windows, a rollcage, metal plating over a majority of your ride and even throw in a few spikes for good measure, just in case you run out of ammo and have to plough through a horde… Or you might just do it for fun, your call.

3. Weight

If you do decide that turning zombies into roadkill is the best option, you’re also going to have to make sure that you’re carrying some weight behind your impact. The last thing you want to do is try and barrel through an angry pack of zombies and stop dead in your tracks, ending your life painfully, embarrassingly and slowly. Nobody wants that. Speaking of which…

4. Power

Torque, to be specific. With all your spare fuel, spare batteries, guns, ammo, friends and armour, you’re going to need a vehicle that can handle all that weight. If you don’t, then you aren’t going anywhere and you’ll be zombie chow before you can say “Oh sh*t I wish I stole my neighbor’s Hummer”. So if your mate says “Hey let’s take my Ford Focus”, just tell him that you’re driving and steal that Hummer.

5. AWD/Off Road Capability

In the likely event that in your travels (or fleeing from bandits, whatever comes first) you come across rough terrain, you’re not going to want turn around and find a different route. It’s inconvenient, time consuming and can be a real strain on fuel, food, water, ammo and morale. So just go through it! This definitely means you aren’t taking the Focus.

6. Space

What’s the point of having a badass zombie-destroying fortress on wheels if you can’t even fit everything in it? I’m sure that you don’t want to have to tow a trailer because that consumes fuel, the time it takes to find one and makes it a lot harder to plough through the undead and make speedy getaways if necessary. Plus it also means more comfortable survivors which in turn equates to happier survivors.

7. Fuel Efficiency

Now I know that with all the NOTLD approved modifications you’ve made so far, fuel efficiency is gonna be tough to factor in but it is a very important thing to think about when modifying your Death Race-esque killing machine. Think about it; zombie apocalypse has hit, only a small percentage of the planet still survives, so what happens to all the oil companies? Even though it’s hard to believe, they’ll collapse just like the rest of civilzation. No oil companies, no oil. No oil, no fuel. You also have to take into account that all the other survivors out there are gunning for the same liquid gold as fuel, food, fresh drinking water and ammunition are the world’s most valuable commodities now.

8. Spares of EVERYTHING

Eventually, guns will break, tyres will go flat, fuel will run out etc. etc. That’s why it’s absolutely imperative that you bring a spare of almost anything important you can imagine. We’re talking fuel, tyres, guns, batteries, ammo, mufflers, just to name a few. Pretty much anything that will break that you can fit in your car you’ll want to take a spare of.

9. A HF/VHF/UHF 2-Way Radio

One of each is preferable. These will allow you to achieve contact with any other survivors that have gotten their mitts on one of these things, probably another reader of this blog! I just gave you something to talk about with your new radio buddy, you’re welcome 🙂 UHF and VHF are currently widely used by Emergency Services but they do have a rather limited range (VHF, 15km max, UHF works in line of sight) especially on the move and their range can be be affected by factors such as terrain and weather. HF radios do have a much better range but are a lot more complex to use as you need to change the frequency depending on the time of day and weather, but they can transmit internationally.

So if you want to have one of these in your kit to be used effectively, you may need to assign a radio specialist to flick through each channel in case there’s someone on one of them and if you do find another survivor out there, find a safe place to park up while you transmit. It may also be worth trying to get your hands on a handheld radio for when you’re on scavenger missions so you can keep in contact with your crew.

10.  Reserve Fuel Tank

For those long trips when fuel stops are few and far between. This will increase your range and with all of that armour and mounted weaponry on your car, no matter how hard you try, your fuel efficiency will suffer. Therefore it’s a good idea to have one so that you don’t run the risk of being stuck out in the middle of nowhere with no fuel. Or even worse, stuck in the middle of a huge horde of hungry flesh eaters with no fuel.

So there you have it. 10 things that will ensure, or at least increase your chances of survival when you hit the road.

Until next time, seeya in the wasteland, survivors!

-Josh

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